Saturday, February 14, 2009

Exclusive: More intercepted e-mail to the CFO!

[Martore, Burns]


To: G. Martore, chief financial officer
FROM: C. Montgomery Burns, loyal employee
DATE: Feb. 14, 2009
RE: Project Softer Side of Al

1. Our octogenarian operative in Cocoa Beach, Fla., has spilled the beans! BA now admits adopting Hopkins during an ill-conceived 1970 bid to win back exotic dancer B-Z-B via elaborate marketing campaign dubbed, "The Softer Side of Al." Hopkins is their love child! (Plus, he's only 39.)

2. Proof positive! We obtained from Brevard County Clerk of the Court a copy of combo adoption/marriage certificate BA signed Valentine's Day 1970, awaiting only signature from his intended; detail, below:

Click on the image to make it even bigger!

I'm trying to earn $6,000 quarterly, mostly through sponsorships of $5 per reader, plus limited ad sales. Please use the "Donate" tool in the green sidebar, upper right. Or mail cash/checks payable to: Jim Hopkins, 584 Castro St. #823, San Francisco, Calif., 94114-2594.

4 comments:

  1. Now, I know why I always look so good in a sharkskin suit!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ROFL! This is great stuff! Thanks for a lighthearted start to the weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't get it.

    But maybe I'm not supposed to.

    ReplyDelete

Jim says: "Proceed with caution; this is a free-for-all comment zone. I try to correct or clarify incorrect information. But I can't catch everything. Please keep your posts focused on Gannett and media-related subjects. Note that I occasionally review comments in advance, to reject inappropriate ones. And I ignore hostile posters, and recommend you do, too."

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.